Silver spoon in my mouth...

Have you ever felt guilty of having the silver spoon fed into your mouth?? Well, I do. Very often, in fact! It kinda started off when a cheeky colleague of mine started a random chat with me during our social bowling outing on Friday night. He said something like this,

"Whoa.. you ahh, must be a rich kid's daughter, right? So fashionable, carry expensive phone....you're like from high society type. Everything must be just a platinum credit card swipe away, right???"

............ =__=


Seriously, it made me pondered what actually gave him that impression. Now that brought be through a guilt trip to look back upon my life in how things are given to me although I never quite desired for it. Truthfully, what he said is kinda..quite true. =S


...Papa got me a phone I never desired for. Don't really appreciate it as much as others do. And beats me why some people are dying to own it. *shrug*

...Papa serviced the car and changed all tyres for me before I drove down to KL.

...When I first arrived KL, I got rather worried about surviving on KL road directions on my own. I prayed *Walla!!*...Papa bought a GPS System from his Singapore trip because it was on promotional price when he was at Sim Lim Square. He loan it to me to make sure I don't end up in Timbuktu while driving. (HAHA..... surprise!! Now you know my secret to my *ahem* direction skills in KL. Think my sense of direction so good??? NAH~~~ !! =P)

...Tolls in KL are everywhere. Seriously, it's just super duper expensive to survive here--Especially on the road. I was grumbling in my heart thinking about the massive cost and before I know it, Papa actually stopped by the toll plaza office and got me a Smart Tag (it's a little censor machine that reads prepaid toll cards) and topped up lotsa $$$ into the card, too!

Honestly, I sometimes still struggle over my life of privilege. Aren't I spoiled to the brim or what? What did I do to deserve it and, worst of all, how much of it have I squandered without a care in the world? While I enjoyed this life of privilege, it was ultimately at the expense of Papa's hard work.

While driving back from work in the midst of the traffic jam yesterday, something kinda came across my mind. I thought, I am too loaded not to do something with what I have. In a very funny way, I started singing that Hillsong song, "so blessed, I can't contain it, so much a gotta give it away...your love has taught me to live now... you are more than enough for me!!" *LoL* Passing drivers must be thinking this girl must be super high on.. something. YAH!! I am high on God's blessings, man!!!

Yes, I am different. Yes, no doubt I am privileged. Yes, I have access to opportunities that others do not. Like Shakespeare said - "All the world's a stage. And all the men and women merely players." The ultimate tragedy is for me to deny my character and waste my purpose in God's stage play.

Coincidentally, I browsed through a random blog online today and found something reassuring and affirmative to my thoughts. It's an exerpt from Nelson Mandela's 1994 inaugural speech when he was elected President of South Africa:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be fabulous, brilliant, talented, gorgeous? Actually, who are you not to be, you are a child of God and playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, like children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in every one of us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give people permission to do the same."

FOoH Laa.. So convicted to do something. My hands are itching...
God has given me an opportunity to join a hospital visitation this coming Saturday with a group of church mates. First time experience. This is gonna be exciting. I'd love to learn from the experienced ones. I so..so...soo...wanna be an impacter!!

So, what about you? Got anything on your list to polish that shine, lately?