I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For (But I Will.)

Been wondering much about miracle God-moments and sometimes I tend to feel that He leaves me out because I'm a "grown-up Christian" and I don't need miracle moments to be reminded of what He's capable of.

I recently dropped a white gold bracelet mum got me for my birthday. I noticed that it was gone probably more than 12 hours later. I was beating myself up for being careless. So the only natural course of action was to retrace my steps. I remembered going on a jog around the neighbourhood the day before (nooooo.. This is bad!)... After coming home from a lunch appointment, I was desperate. I took a walk around the neighbourhood at 2pm under the drizzle... I walked along the trail that rings so much familiarity. I had many meaningful conversations with God with my earphones plugged in almost every week jogging on this same trail. 

This time, I had nothing... I walked under the rain empty handed. Without music blasting in my eardrums, the journey seemed more silent than ever. I said my familiar "hello" to the God who always accompany me on the trail, again. I muttered my disbelief to Him that I don't think I'll locate the bracelet because I've lost it for more than 12 hours. Then I heard Him saying to me, "You will not lose what's yours, trust me, it's somewhere close to you." Still in disbelief I wrestled and insisted on taking a second chance around the neighbourhood under the rain. Again. (Seriously, when we're desperate, we'd do anything, eh?) And found nothing. Sigh. Disappointed but not surprised, I went home... Trying to find my trust in the voice I heard, I went searching around places close to me -- my handbag, bedside, sofa, dustbin. Nothing. I finally gave in to Him, and said... "I give up, I surrender, I'm going to stop looking. If I find it, it had to be You. And I promise I'll talk about it!" I walked up the stairs to head to the shower to clean up my drenched self and crafting my speech in my head on how to break the news to mum that I lost it. As I walked up the stairs, my eyes spotted the bracelet immediately after I said those words of surrender. See it right there in this pic? 

Yep, I left my laptop backpack next to the stairs because some construction was taking place in my bathroom. I sat on the floor staring at it for a good few seconds and I bawled my eyes out because I knew God had a deeper message for me. Something made some sense. So this is what it feels like when you "reunite" with something precious to you. Perhaps this was how He felt when He reunited with the prodigal daughter that was once lost (e.g. Yours truly?).

"A man’s heart plans his way, But the LORD directs his steps." -Proverbs 16:9 

In the midst of searching and waiting on God, He directs. I may plan my ways to figure out where, what, who and how, but it is He who directs me to find it. He knows. He leads. I follow. I go. I find. He knew I needed a miracle moment.

Is there something you're searching and waiting on? Sometimes, it's not a bad idea to lose control. Give up to Him, surrender, stop your navigating. He's the pilot, co-pilot with Him. He knows better and He'll lead the way. He's got it all mapped out already. Let go, and let God. The road leads home. For me, it did, literally. It's probably somewhere not too far away. You might find it at the most unexpected places. Just let Him lead you there.   

"Say thank you in advance for what is already yours ... True desire in the heart for anything good is God's proof to you sent beforehand that it's already yours ... When you get it, reach back, pull someone else up." - Denzel Washington

Help me in my unbelief. 
I still haven't found what I'm looking for.... 
But it's ok. I know He's directing my steps there.
I want to believe.

Thank You in advance.

(I promised I'd talk about it, so there, Glory To You, Big Man! You Win!:D)

I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

I have climbed the highest mountains
I have run through the fields
Only to be with you
Only to be with you.

I have run, I have crawled
I have scaled these city walls
These city walls
Only to be with you.

But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.

I have kissed honey lips
Felt the healing in her finger tips
It burned like fire
(I was) burning inside her.

I have spoke with the tongue of angels
I have held the hand of a devil
It was warm in the night
I was cold as a stone.

But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.

I believe in the Kingdom Come
Then all the colours will bleed into one
Bleed into one.
But yes, I'm still running.

You broke the bonds
And you loosed the chains
Carried the cross of my shame
Oh my shame, you know I believe it.

But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.

But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for.

By U2 from the album 

"The Joshua Tree"